Category: Feeling it

Love’s many twists, turns, avenues, and lanes

IMG_7556Love

Love of Family

Love of Friends

Love of a Spouse

Love of a Partner

Love of a Child

Love of our Pets

Love of Animals

Love of Earth

Love of Nature

Love of Religion

Love of Country

Love of a Thought

Love of an Ideal

Love of Power

Love of Success

Love of the Arts

Love of the Adventure

Love of Home

Love of Life

Love of Death

Love of the Unknown

Love of ___________

A simple word yet a word that yields such power when spoken, when written, more when felt. Crazy how four normal letters when placed together can generate the heat they do in people, in actions, in ideas, in movements, in animals, in life’s everyday and grandiose events. Love can move mountains and crumble dynasties. It is taken for granted. It is forgotten. It is abused and neglected. It is cherished and nurtured. It is old and new. It is young and experienced. It is worked for. It is wished for. It soothes and cradles. It is misunderstood. It is studied and dissected. It is talked about openly and whispered behind closed doors. It is coveted and twisted. It is a rush and a high of delight. It is a crushing blow of pain. It is at the root of everything and what we do with it nourishes or strangles the life of all that it touches. Love’s power with the many twists, turns, avenues, and lanes is an amazing and beautiful gift. Such a gift should be yielded with care and with the whole heart making life a much more beautiful and amazing place to be. How do you perceive love…. How do you give and receive love…. How do you show love? Such a powerful word with such a way all it’s own………………………..H

Long live the Queen

imageSometimes no matter how hard you try the crown just doesn’t fit, but in true queen style you wear that bitch anyway and go about ruling the world- well your little piece of it anyway ;)! Sometimes baby steps in comfy flats, sometimes catwalk stride in Louie Vuitton’s, and sometimes owning it strut in bargain knock offs. Many crowns worn on any given day at any given time! Don’t know why this picture makes me LOL or think these things, but it does. Every day I’m owning it, working it, or trying to figure it out hmmm guess that’s why it does. The look of trying for dignity for the happenings going on around mingled with a spark of humility at being seen in such a state sprinkled with a dash of hope it’ll all end on a good note. Yeah a look I see every morning. {Either that or a look of say good bye to a favorite pair of shoes for this embarrassment ;).} I’m finding life is a new show every day even when I replay the same scene over and over. Funny how that works even more funny is how interesting life has become now that I see it this way…………………………….H

A piece missing

IMG_8890The sun shined and the sky cleared the day I spotted you sitting there. Nestled in that crowed dish just waiting for me, I realized you were my wish. I wore you proudly happily content until the day you were torn away, broken and bent. I’ve looked high, I’ve looked low been searching it seems for ever and then more. You are not to be found so it seems almost making it seem like finding you was all a dream. It’s with a sad broken heart that I realize no one has you any where, not even causally tossed lying around say in a dish again waiting to be found. I’ll keep searching for the day on my silver chain you again lay!

Ha cheesy and corny that’d be me, but a truer heart for the things (and people) I hold dear, hold sentimentally close and don’t want to part with you will not find. To see me at a quick glance one would not think so I know as I’ve been told many times before. I don’t look like one to hold on especially to things big, small, significant or insignificant. Yet I do because I am ridiculously sensitive and for me the memory attached or the feeling is what gets and holds me tight. It’s crazy how a memory can be sparked and boom you are transported back to a happy feeling/memory/place/person/experience, like a personal time machine. I like and collect frogs ( no I do not know why!) not your normal every day child like stuffed cartoon type frog, but expressive pieces or cravings, unique styles like say a magical find, in a small bead store, in Lake Tahoe- where a simple delicate tiny glass frog waited for me to come along. It was a dollar and the best purchased I ever made. Wearing it made me smile, made me feel like a princess-though guess at my age more like an old queen ;), made me feel like a million dollars and that there was nothing I couldn’t do. Sounds funny to say out loud well to write down, but that’s how it was. It was my talisman, my shield if you will, against the world. That’s what makes something sentimental, important enough to seek to search out again and again cause the feeling you get, you have, the energy, and state of mind you find yourself in is priceless. Yup that’s it that’s the word priceless…….. no matter how big or small, how expensive or cheap, given or purchased when some thing, some place, some sound, some smell, some whatever makes you sentimental and full of happiness well that some “______” is most definitely priceless! How could a person not want to keep that some thing close or go looking when it is lost or broken? They can’t cause if they could then it wouldn’t be sentimental and thus priceless to them. Here’s to cherishing the things material or otherwise that makes us stop and appreciate, cherish and hold dear, and keep us looking no matter what when lost (and to hopefully finding again one day)………………………..H

The Ending

My head aches, my heart hurts, there’s a pain in my center like a brutally cold frozen winter.

You’re hit or miss, up and down, am I friend or foe, will you stay or will you go.

So hard to read, so closed at times, I doubt my sanity while following blind.

Patting the puppy expect to be bitten, especially given how thinly your disdain and ridicule are hidden.

Not the country bumpkin seen at first glance, there’s a strong bullshit meter built in with a temper to match.

My wall has been hit, my line crossed, no more dances left in the game it seems I’ve lost.

Respect gone if ever there, amazing to me how cold one can be and still say they care.

It’s a two way street of give and take, now sideways made one way and totally, completely, heartbreakingly fake.

Open and honest, supportive and kind only to watch you toss it away leaving it behind.

You asked so much, giving nothing in return, leaving it all to crumble and our bridge to burn.

Patting this puppy and you got bitten, for I see it all now, your disdain and ridicule were never truly hidden.

I let you go, set you free to find, your happiness the likes I can’t provide.

I wish you well, I do you see, for even with the saddest of hearts and a sea of tears cruelty is just simply not a part of what makes me, ME………………………H

 

A canvas like no other

The sky to me is magic; pure honest magic. A place I have been painting and drawing my whole life. When things go sideways, which they often do, all I have to do is step outside and look up to find my way back to my normal. Whether staying up to the wee morning hours staring at the magical, sparkling, winking in mischief the starry night……..imageLooking for new clusters, new designs, new patterns, or finding my old tried and true ones peace is always found.

imageEnergy raw pure intense energy surges of power vibrating in the very breath around you. The storm clouds bring promise of change sometimes good sometimes bad but always change. A rebirth in a way because no matter how strong or how soft the storm might be the soft patter of drops or a gnarly rush of rain a cleansing always follows. Washing the soil, the plants, animals, structures, people, and the earth anew.

There is a calm, a peace that settles deep in one’s center at the magic show playing out in front of the eyes; all in slow motion so as not to miss a moment of the action. Each sense coming alive reaching out searching trying to touch, to take hold, flourishing at the gentle scenes rolling by. Often making the observer slow down and see truly open their eyes and really look around, possibly seeing for the first time or possibly slipping into a familiar comfortable seat from years past. image

However or whenever it happens flying free, soaring high, exploring all……always a gift to be thankful for, cherished, used, and hopefully shared. So paint away, dream on, and create as you wish……………………..H

Letting Go

You love me, shake me to my core, only to turn away and love me no more. I hold you with these weathered hands, watching as you slowly slip through them like grains from the soft glistening sand. Floating away on the wink of light you give just before saying goodnight. I’ll wait in the cold with the moon above, waiting for that first kiss of day, to search anew for my elusive golden love.

 Sun down sun low golden waves crashing into the shore…………H

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Down and Dirty

imageWhat is it about playing in the dirt that makes everything fade away!? The smell- damp musty sweet decay of the soil takes me to a calm relaxed place; where it’s just me and nature getting down and dirty playing having a ball! Sinking my hands deep into the soil, feeling the soft lightly squishy yet silky grains slide over my hands and fingers brings me an almost sureal kind of peace. The simple yet dedicated act of placing the rocks, soil, plant, then more soil and food is a process that gives clarity without thinking.

imageTucking, patting, placing the plant all snug in it’s new home, promising to care for it with love and appreciation, I step back and see the beauty that we, the plant and I, have made. Beauty that will give me a smile each and every time I stare out and see how it’s flourishing, growing big and tall, alive and breathing just like me. Sounds lame to some I know, but the healing given as well as received is priceless to me. It is the adult version of playing in the sand box, playing in the mud, and for me making mud pies like I did when I was young. It is the act of playing that brings rewards and joy for a very long time to come. Ha play time that never ends…….. Yeah I like that because when I look out and see the progress made it makes me stand a little taller, smile a little wider, laugh a little happier. Not to mention it makes the back porch a lovely place to be! Grow be fat and healthy my new little gem 😉 you let me see the beauty in playing like a child again………H